Thank you, 2018

2018… wow it’s been a year of wholehearted adventures. full of growth, learning and laughter. Looking back on the past 12 months, I am proud to say I have personally accomplished a lot. 

I’ve said it many times but I lived and worked at camp from June through August. In the 6 months leading up to camp this year, I was preparing as much as I could. Mentally and physically. This summer put me through a lot. Many times I thought that I wasn’t going to make it, that I wasn’t doing enough for myself or my campers and I was pushing myself as much as I actually could. I came home crying a few times sadly. Actually, that wasn’t just this summer. That was this year in general. This year threw many curveballs my way that I didn’t necessarily know how to handle. I have gotten a lot closer with God this year. And hope my relationship with Him keeps growing each year!

This past year taught me so much about healing. I have had a lot of time to just step back and work on healing myself. I’m proud to say, right now I’m doing the best I have about this situation in a long time!

A quick overview and some highlights from my 2018: 

In January, I went to Washington DC for my 3rd time there (4th time in a few weeks!!)

I also won free Tshirts from Sassy Frass TShirts for a year! 

In February, I went to camp for the weekend. (you’ll start to notice a little bit of a trend haha) And actually the big thing that was on my heart and mind this month, was I was put into a situation that ended with a decision that I knew I had to make. I didn’t make  an angry decision- I prayed for weeks about it and I realized it was finally time. I chose myself over an organization I was apart of for almost 2 years. I personally chose to be happy, instead of involved, which I can admit has been difficult in many ways since I left. But, in this situation, I wholeheartedly chose myself instead of anything else. I didn’t stay involved in something just because it was comfortable to me. I really didn’t know what the future held but I knew this is what I wanted. 

In March, I took my first trip to Cincinnati and  we went to Kentucky for the first time as well! I hung out with Dan & Chris the whole weekend and have wanted to go back since! I went to my first eagle eye retreat, It really was a trip that I needed. 

In April, the lake house opened and I spent time there before I had to leave for camp. I also spend a lot of time with the girls I babysit and The Crew. Also in April and May, I was struggling a lot with change in my friend group. We were all still friends but I was moving away for the summer, and a lot of my friends were moving into new houses or leaving for the summer as well. I wanted to spend as much time with them in the current season we were in as much as possible.

In May, I finished sophomore year of college! I was also at the lake a bunch and then took a trip to Cedar Point with Pip and Chris. On this trip, I learned my best friends Christy and Kev were having a baby due in early December! I also got an iPhone X in May. I was convinced I would never get rid of my 6s because I loved it but it was getting really slow. I am enjoying my new phone and it was nice to know my phone would work at camp.

Then June finally came! I had 9 days to pack my suitcases, scroll through articles found on google about being a great camp counselor, take a picture and post that I was going to be at camp for the next two months, and say goodbye to my friends and family! The first week was staff training- full of learning and meeting new friends. We put our hammocks up and “hung” out all week!

This summer, I became a camp counselor for the first time to 7 different groups of 7-9 year old girls. When I got my first session of campers, I was beyond excited and that’s when my full summer at camp actually started! 20 days of camp later, Storer had its 100 year celebration. It was incredible. So many people and about 100 degrees but everyone was happy to be at camp again. It was very interesting to meet people that also love the same place I do- and have for years and hopefully many more to come!

July was just full of camp for me. I got to come home each Friday evening and had to be back early Sunday morning!  I had such sweet campers but there were a lot of nights where I didn’t think I was good enough for them. The drive there and back every weekend was actually pretty nice to be able to reflect on my past week or my week that was soon to start right when my feet hit the ground. July was also the month where my mom, dad, sister and I started to love word searches. Why? I have no idea but it was something random and fun to do together!

August came and we finished with summer camp and on my birthday (August 5th), we started Camp Catch a Rainbow- which is a week-long camp for kids with cancer. The campers and their volunteers taught me so much about myself, how strong and smart they are and basically just about the world around me as well. They were amazing. This week was totally my favorite week of the summer! When CCAR was over, I got to come home for good! I was very sad I wasn’t going back to camp, just a few days later and knew I would miss my campers a lot but oh my gosh was I excited to be home!

September was the month where I was just getting back into the swing of things at home and I started my first semester of junior year! I also went to Cedar Point again for their Christian Point Fest concert- we saw Hollyn, Crowder, For King and Country and TobyMac. I loved it! Oh and The Fulton County Fair! How could I forget! I’ve been going to fair since I was less than a month old. We also watched fireworks on a random night in late September, which was hilarious!

In October, I went to the lake a few last times of the season. I also traveled back to camp and worked the CCAR Family Camp! It was so sweet to get to meet some of my camper’s families. On the last night, I sung my campers a song that is really special to the camp staff and I wanted to cry because I knew I wasn’t going to be there for another year.

In November, I went on a super fun weekend trip to Hocking Hills with the Catholic Student Association at UT. It was totally out of my comfort zone because I didn’t know many people and we hiked for a total of 5 and half hours on that Saturday. But I am so glad I went and got to experience the beauty around me that God gave us! After that trip, I got sick. I don’t even mean for a few days….  I mean for 3 and half weeks. It was really     bad :(

In December, all I did was prepare Christmas presents for The Crew and my family! And go to Christmas parties. I also got to meet sweet Baby James. I can’t believe how cute he is:) I went to his baptism in late December and got to see all of my friends again. It was a really nice day!

This year was one for the books for sure. Lots of learning and growing and becoming a better version of myself.  I learned how to walk away from something I loved for almost 2 years and how to walk into something I have always wanted to do. I kept moving on from things that I knew weren't going to help me in the long run, and found more things to put my mind too. I learned to wholeheartedly rely on God to get me through tough times and enjoy where I was. This summer at camp really showed me how to get creative and love the world around me. 2018 taught me how to move on and learn something totally new. I worked a lot, went to school each day of the week, tried to keep my room clean and be with my family and friends and babysat in between. It got hectic at times but I am just so blessed to be able to do so much with my life right now. I’m not sure what this next year holds but I am excited to find out!

Wholehearted: to complete with sincerity and commitment. 

on my story…

MY STORY

I think telling your story and letting others hear it is one of the most important things to do. 
I have told my story before on my blog but just this past weekend I realized everything became full circle and how I got to where I am today. 

The summer before my junior year of high school, I went to the first youth group I had ever been to. It was Sunday nights in our parish community room. I don’t really remember all the details but I pretty quickly became friends with the leaders of the youth group. Who quickly became the best people I have ever met. I call The Crew. I have blogged about them many times but they are just that great!

So I’m actually going to pause this part of the story really quick to mention what happened a few months later... 

In April of that same year, the one best friend that I had for two years prior started dating a not-so-good guy. I warned her about this and she then started only talking to the friends she had that supported her new-found relationship. She dropped me very quickly and I was then left like I was nothing. She told me many times that I was a terrible person and I was never going to go anywhere in life and so much more that I have blocked out of my memory. I couldn’t be more proud of myself because that turned out to be completely false.

Okay, we can now un-pause my first story, I feel like God put The Crew into my life at the exact moment He did because He knew I would need them at a time where I was going through a hard season of my life (and for the rest of forever honestly.) He knew I needed to fall back on and rely on these friends. See, The Crew is not at all like the girl I was just talking about... they 
would do anything for me. They drop everything when I text in the group chat 

that I need prayers. They call me just to catch up and ask how I’m doing. My parents trust them more than I think they trust me sometimes. They push me closer to Christ in every way and have extremely strengthened my faith in the past four years.

The craziest thing is if the girl I was describing never stopped being friends with me:

I would be nowhere. I would be in the same season of life I was in.1

I would not be as strong in my faith as I am now because I probably wouldn't have created a friendship with The Crew who help me to be the best version of myself daily.

I would not have gone on the retreat I did this past weekend because

I wouldn’t have any desire to. These past four years of knowing them, 

I have become such a better person and Catholic. 

Here’s a list of many many things in my life that I would have never done 
if I never stopped being friends with that girl... 

-I would have never taken 2 (about to be 3) trips to Washington DC for The March for Life each January.
-I would never have gotten invited by The Crew to multiple movies (where there’s like 20 of us in the movie theater and we take up the whole row!)
-Or to Cincinnati for a weekend trip (we even went to Kentucky and I got to cross that state off my list!)
-Or to bowling nights- which are always a blast and a competition!

-Or many many many concerts!! I love Christian Music now and Country Music even more

-Or to game nights with lots of laughter and popcorn and ice cream
-I would have never gotten to experience my best friends getting married
and having a baby! (Which I am very thankful I got to be there for those!)
-Or go tent camping for the first time!
-Or have an extreme support system behind me through the good and the bad,
-Or just any other crazy adventures we take together…

I am extremely thankful and blessed that I get to live life with my best friends in the entire world. God is so good for giving them to me. The coolest thing is, wherever we are when I look around, I know each one of my friends care about me and want to see me succeed which I have never had before. I am endlessly blessed to be able to confide in each one of these people and
keep meeting even more people they know! I have never had friends like this, my only regret is if I could have met them sooner! It still blows my mind everyday that they choose to keep me around, even when I don’t deserve them at all. 

A different part of my life I was reflecting on this weekend was,

I would have never gone on this retreat if I never had dropped out of the organization I was apart of for almost two years. 

I left that organization in March of this year, and I was totally looking for some other way 

to use my extra time. You know, I have been involved in something that I chose to participate in at school since I was in 8th grade, or even since Kindergarten if you want to think about things I had to do and didn’t choose to. At that point, I was almost a junior in college who woke up one day and was suddenly not involved at all. So I sat around and thought about it, went to my university’s club  fair and nothing really stuck out. I knew I just had to get more involved in the Catholic Student Association on campus. I was looking for those friends and that part of my life to be full again. I am very glad to have found both of those this weekend. Life has a crazy way of working out for the better. 

Everything is going to turn out the exact way God planned for you. He is in complete control.

Your situation is going to get better and I pray that each one of you can find God and your people to completely fall back on when you are struggling like I did. 

my travel essentials

Hey everyone!

In honor of (already) planning some trips for next year because it’s never too early for that, I decided to sit down and think about some of my absolute travel essentials that I need on the go! Whether it’s one day away from home or a whole week, these are the things I can not live without!!

Now, ya girl loves to travel. But the thing is I haven’t been to many places at all actually- 7 states and Washington DC. So I’m not a complete expert on this but I did live out of a suitcase at camp for 2 months so maybe  that sorta counts?!

My essentials: 

I love getting new cute duffle bags and tote bags! If you talk to my dad, he says he never wants to see another bag in the house… whoops, I may have too many!! But recently I have became obsessed with the reusable bags from TJMaxx/Marshall’s/Home Goods they are a big size and have a long handle— and the best thing ever is that they are only 99 cents in the checkout line at these stores. I swear I must have taken at least 5 to camp when I lived there! I would take them when I walked to a different building to shower during my Time Off (they are made out of a high quality waterproof material). I put my clothes I was going to change into, my shower caddy, which is another one of my essentials, my phone and charger, can’t forget snacks and honestly anything else I needed for my TO in this bag. These bags are also perfect to give as gifts, wrap things up and put them inside and it’s like another reusable gift! They come in many colors and designs— They’re perfect!

My shower caddy is another essential I love. I bought a pack of 2 on Amazon. They are circle shower caddies that have dividers inside, a handle and collapse for easy storage. Inside, I had shampoo, conditioner, body wash, washcloth, a brush and sometimes even my phone while playing music! It was a big help to hang on the hooks inside the shower when there was no other room to put anything!

Talking about showering again… lol

When I go anywhere, I usually pack travel sized shampoo, conditioner and body wash containers. You can buy the products in the travel/trial sized section at a store or fill up empty bottles yourself. The refillable travel bottles can come in a set or by themselves. Sometimes it is easier and cheaper to buy the empty bottles and fill them up with product! These are cheap reusable small bottles instead of having to bring the full sized item. I love saving money and even though, this is a small tip it might save you a few dollars!

Ohh girl, dry shampoo is probably the essential I need the most on these trips. My hair gets greasy very easily and I don’t always have time to wash my hair every night while I’m away. I usually throw in some dry shampoo, put my hair in messy bun or two quick braids and a thick headband (also a must have for me)and I’m on my way! Find a dry shampoo that you love and thank me later because it is especially helpful when you are traveling!

Another essential that I have and will never stop purchasing are “OXY deep pore cleaning facial pads”. These things are a life saver and get so much dirt and gross-ness out of your skin. I have used these to take my makeup off if I don’t have anything else to use, I use them in the morning when I wake up, if I feel like my skin needs to get cleaned up in the middle of the day, and at night before I go to bed. I use these at home and on the go. They come in a small container and do not dry out quickly. They help reduce acne and prevent future breakouts. I highly suggest these OXY facial pads!

If you are going on a road trip, I suggest being as comfortable as possible. Bring a pillow & blanket for the ride! I also suggest wearing leggings or sweatpants that have pockets in them so you can keep what you need on you at all times, even when you get out of the vehicle.

If you are going to be gone for a long period of time or just know you will have to change quite often while traveling, a portable mesh hamper will help tremendously. I never knew I would need one until I took it to camp this summer. I got mine for free from PINK during a promotion they had going. But, they are pretty cheap on Amazon. It also had another purpose for me on the way there, I put blankets and my pillow in it instead of leaving it empty.

Also, obviously headphones are a great thing to pack as well. There have been many times where I have forgotten to bring mine and it is just not fun! I bought the ones I currently own off of Amazon for less than $8. They are rose gold which is my favorite and have magnets on the end of each earbud so they can connect together. This is a simple but easy way to stay entertained and not bored while traveling!

Something else I have been trying to get into is books. More like novels or auto-biographies people write & I’m interested in. I don’t read much so when I do, I have to love it! I am currently reading a book from an amazing lady who has a great podcast! I challenge you to find a book you like and check it out— even if it takes months to read like me!

Also, if you are going somewhere like a camp or even somewhere where you know you won’t have a nightstand or dresser (this kind of serves as both) you can bring a 3 drawer  organizer. I wouldn’t bring this everywhere, only when you really really need it, but I was basically living out of this thing this summer. I bought mine for $13 and it was the brand “Sterilite”. They are easy to find at Walmart, Target, Kroger… any store that sells storage items. I put extra shoes, folders, a first aide kit, and anything else I needed as a counselor in it. On top, I put my phone when it was charging as I was sleeping, my glasses, chapstick… it was a catch-all for me and I’m so glad I had it! 

Another huge essential for me is the “EasyAcc Power Bank” found on Amazon. This power bank is unlike any I have ever used. It can charge up to 4 phones at once, has a flashlight, and has amazing battery life. For example, last summer my friends and I went tent camping for a weekend and it kept my iPhone 6s charged throughout the whole weekend and still had battery left over. And I am always on my phone, playing music or taking pictures. My family and I bring this on road trips, I bring this on the 9 hour bus ride to DC and back or anywhere we know we won’t have access to an outlet but still want to have our phones charged. It’s probably one of the best purchases I have made!

If you are going somewhere like tent camping or to camp, a twin-sized foam mattress pad is a must! This is also something I don’t bring everywhere but very helpful when I needed it. I bought mine for less than $20 off Amazon (Can you tell I where I like to get things cheap?) When I was sleeping in the tent last summer, instead of sleeping directly on the hard ground, I put a fuzzy blanket down first, my mattress pad and then my sleeping bag. It was great! Also when I was at camp, I usually put 2 mattresses down and my mattress pad and sheets on top of that. It makes it much more comfortable to sleep at night and feels like your own bed!

As always, snacks are also a huge thing. If you know you are staying in a hotel without free breakfast, bring a box of granola bars or another one of your favorite quick breakfast foods. This is something I always do so I don't have to worry about spending extra money and so I can leave the hotel quicker. I also bring snacks honestly anywhere! To go along with the snacks, bring a Swell bottle (or honestly a knock off, I have 3 different kinds of stainless steel bottles that aren’t the Swell brand but the exact same) and fill them up with ice water. It will last a long time and something you will definitely love if you brought it!  

When I go to DC, I know that the bus is going to stop at certain roadside stops. Most of them have a Subway restaurant, Panera, Starbucks or something similar to any of these where you can get it to-go… 

I have a Kroger card (or anywhere you might have a rewards card to) and I like to buy gift cards to those places. I do this so I can get gas points on my Kroger card. I know I’m going to eat at these places so might as well by the gift cards before and get gas points out of them! 

If you couldn’t tell already, I’m an over-packer which can sometimes be a nightmare but I like to be prepared! These are some of my absolute travel essentials I always bring with me.

Hope you enjoyed & Safe Travels to you:)

 

Making a message out of your mess

If anyone reading this knows me, you know my life is a complete mess at the moment. You know that I commute to college everyday about 40 minutes each way- I basically live out of my car while doing so, you know my shirt usually has a stain on it from eating on the go (some days I actually eat every meal in my car) and you know my hair doesn’t always stay in place. You know I don’t live near anything at all so basically I have to drive quite a distance to get somewhere and I put way too many miles on my 1996 Buick - which is two years older than me - while doing that. 

But you (or people close enough to me) also know it’s not just what I look like or how clean my car is but it’s also my mind is a total mess as well. It’s going in every possible direction at all times of the day and night.  I have a job, I babysit, I go to school. 

I also have places that I love and want to be at 24/7. Home, Camp, The Lake… to name just a few. I try to keep up a social life with my friends, and I really do try to go to church as much as I can. Fall is an extremely busy time! 

But I can’t be everywhere at once. I am only one person, I can only do so much. This is the biggest lesson I have been learning in the past 2&1/2 months since I’ve been home from camp… I can’t be everywhere. As much as I want to and as much as I try, I can’t do all the things at once. I have extremely bad “FOMO” and have taken off many weekends at work because of it. See, at camp I could walk to the waterfront, walk to the dining hall, walk to the health office, walk to pretty much anywhere on camp. And now I can’t do that at home. 

EDIT: I think I have "FOMO" which stands for the fear of missing out, so bad because I never had a close friend group growing up. It took me almost 16 years to find my forever friends but I write about that in many different parts on my blog. 
I never had friends that I could hang out with and just be kids with when I was little. 
I missed out on a lot, up until I was a teenager, because my class was very rude to me. I can remember many afternoons when I would come home just crying my eyes out because the other students would say mean things to me, I can remember many days when I heard about birthday parties and hang outs that I was never invited to. I think this is the reason why I have "FOMO" because I was constantly surrounded by several different situations like this over the first 16 years of my life.
Now I know The Crew knows a bit about this but they don't, actually no one but my immediate family, knows the extent of this. It definitely negatively impacted my life. 

The world is so big and there are lots and lots of things to do out there- that I want to experience. I’m much more of a experience person than a person who wants gifts (I love getting/giving gifts, don’t get me wrong) but take me on an adventure. Let’s post some cool pictures to Instagram. (we can thank the social media major in me for that) Let’s tell stories and make memories in every moment. I don’t want to be stuck in a building all day. I can not possibly wait until I can work from literally anywhere in the world. 

So yeah, being busy is hard. But also doing everything alone is also really freaking hard too. Everything I do, I am by myself. I drive to campus by myself, I go to babysitting by myself, I go to church events by myself.

Ever since I got home from camp, I have felt nothing but lonely. I came home to my loving family & friends like usual, but it’s not like living with 70+ other staff, doing the same thing as you, 24/7. But I really am trying to embrace this hectic time of my life. I rely on random encouraging messages from friends, hour long conversations with my aunt on the phone or seeing one of our regular customers at work. I hate being alone most of the time because absolutely love people. (I think that’s the ENFP in me) I totally am a people person so mostly whenever I am this busy, it’s because I know a lot of people and never want to miss out on things happening with them!

Out of my mess, I want people to learn that it’s okay to be busy and it’s okay to get home at the end of the night and not be able to keep your eyes open. You’re blessed to be living this life where you can know and love all sorts of people and where you can know and love all sorts of places in this world… It’s okay for you to try and do “all the things” but it’s also okay to fail at that. No one can do it all, take it easy on yourself. 

Don’t stress out too much, it’ll be alright.

to summer 2018…

to summer 2018:

From April 25 to August 26th, this summer was one I will never forget. Honestly, I know that sounds cliche but believe me. I won’t forget it. 

I got to spend time at the lake… Went to Shipshewana three times- love that place!

I spent time with the best friends around- The Crew. (But you all know them already!) I spent time with my family and went on an evening trip to the beach. I got to spend time with the little girls I babysit, they are the cutest! I got an IPhone X & have been loving all the features!

I found out my friends are having a baby! I took a wonderful trip to Cedar Point with Chris and Pip. We had a great friendship reunion and I got to hang out with my friend Amanda. I heard CJ perform live in concert a bunch, he’s doing amazing at it! I got to go to dinner with my aunt a few times, always super fun. I turned 20 this summer & finally got the courage to try a Starbucks coffee drink and now it’s my favorite thing!! (I don’t drink coffee so this is a big thing for me— my typical order is either a Strawberry Açaí Refresher with lemonade and no ice or the new Ultra Carmel Frappuccino!!) The neighbor kids, Anna and I got into an intense paintball fight together in the backyard. We got extremely dirty!! I got 8&1/2 inches cut off my hair-- and because of that I had to say goodbye to my usual side braid but it's okay it's just hair... it'll grow back!

Also somehow I fit work in there?!

And the crazy thing is…

Most of this is all before I left for summer camp!

I was working at camp from June 10-August 10! (I made a blog post about that, of course as well!!)

I had an absolute incredible, busy, jammed packed summer but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I was glad to be surrounded by my friends (no matter if they were brand new to me or old friends I've had) and my family who are always there to help me out. Life is so extremely busy and always has many different things going on but coming home after camp to people who I love the most is something I will forever cherish. 

No matter how hard and long the days were, I loved this summer and would probably do it over if I could!

my summer as a camp counselor

If you didn’t know, I have been a camp counselor for the past 2 months! I have experienced more than I ever thought possible. Even though there were some bumps in the road, I had a great time this summer. Here are some random posts that I wrote while I was there—

------------------

Dear Kresge Lodge,

Thank you for being my home during my first year at summer camp. And what an amazing 2 months it has been. Full of growth and learning, experiencing new things and bonding with both campers and my fellow counselors. Kresge, I want to thank you for loving me so well. Thank you for comforting me during my sad moments and celebrating with me after my great days. Thank you for a warm bed and making me smile each night I close my eyes. Thank you for always having a light to guide me home after my late night TOs. Thank you for teaching me the meaning of responsibility and time management (but also sleeping in for as long as I possibly could).
Thank you for always having a cozy corner that I can call my own for the week.

Kresge provided a safe place that gave me joy that I, in turn, shared with my campers and it gave me the opportunity to make a difference in so many lives.. It was hard leaving it for the last time knowing I wasn’t going to move back in a few days later. I’m going to miss you, Kresge!

------------------

If you didn’t already know, this is my first time at summer camp. But it’s not my first time at camp, actually it was 9 years ago in April. So just as much as the campers learned for their first time at camp, they weren’t alone- I was learning all the time too.

So, Even after years of staying here at camp and over 13 visits, 6 weeks at summer camp is barely enough time to appreciate all Storer has to offer and learn all the amazing traditions that take place here. I really wish I could have done so much more while I was there. 
I couldn’t think of anything else to say but Thank you. 

I will miss calling these beautiful 1,280 acres my home. Thank you for changing my life, Storer from the second I stepped onto property for the first time, 9 years ago. You mean the world to me and I’m so proud that I grew up as ‘the girl who never stopped talking about camp’. From the chants and songs, to the evening program traditions and meeting people from across the world and every little thing in between, I appreciate you very much Storer. 

This summer I learned honestly more than I thought I would. One of the things I learned was it’s healthy to put everything behind for a bit and just go. I learned that sometimes you just need to get out, get out of your comfort zone, out of your city, out of the constant memories you cry over and try something new- something you’ll never forget and I promise that I will never forget my time at camp this summer. 

I also learned that new friends, fresh air and sunshine can keep us going no matter what even when things get tough. (And a quick call home can solve just about anything if those don’t work!) And I swear that is the best medicine in the whole world.

Sometimes you prepare for camp for 7 months and get there and have no clue what you’re getting into. You’re immediately living 24/7 with these people that you just met and it’s actual insanity but super fun. We like to call it ‘organized chaos’.

It was amazing to go back to camp where I recently have spend a lot of my time. I saw myself in my little 7, 8 and 9 year olds for the week- they were there with their sweaty faces and greasy hair and always so much enthusiasm and dance parties and giggles. 

I also saw myself in my fellow counselors with no makeup on, exhausted eyes, no voice but wouldn’t be anywhere else faces. 

I also wouldn’t want to spend my 19th Birthday last year and my 20th birthday this year, anywhere else!

As I pulled out of the gates for the last time and ended my first summer camp season, I just want to say that you're a treasure, camp, and I want you to know that. When I closed my eyes on my very last night maybe ever staying there, I knew I made a great decision to spend my summer with you. 

The staff really turned into family and were always there when I needed someone.

There were points during the week when I didn’t have signal to load my social media and I felt so unconnected from the real world- which is so unlike me. There were some nights when I just laughed harder than I ever had before, some nights when I sat back and enjoyed the people and scenery around me, some nights I watched crazy work outs and makeshift soccer games inside, some nights when I never wanted to leave.

Also the camp bubble is so extreme; immediately you have hardly any phone signal, you live out of a suitcase on a bunk bed for 2 months, you don’t know what’s going on in the outside world, you’re practically working 24 hours a day, and time passes so much differently there. There were moments when I felt so trapped there, I love camp always have but staying for 6 days in a row and not being able to leave property was extremely hard for me. I am a very adventurous person and I couldn’t even go see the city I was living near for the summer. Sometimes you prepare for camp for 7 months and get a month into it and your whole cabin gets a lice scare and you have to go home for 5 days and you cry so hard because you don’t want to leave in the middle of the session (or ever) and when you get home, all of your stuff has to be in garbage bags outside and your mom has to dig through your hair. it’s a weird experience. (thankfully I didn’t have it!)  At most points during camp this summer, I felt like I couldn’t breathe and had to keep reminding myself to. There were moments when I got yelled at and didn’t think I could take another step. But I did, I got up and kept walking.

But I am very glad I made it through this summer and it feels great to be home! 

But honestly, How can you not fall in love with the evening sun shining down on you and the gentle breeze blowing through your hair. If every moment could be like this, I’d love it. On the very last night, myself and a group of staff members took a pontoon ride and tied up together out on the lake. We watched THE most beautiful sunset I’ve ever seen in my entire life. And I promise I’m not just saying it. The whole sky was shades of pink and orange and it was reflecting off the water. We were all amazed. I’m so glad I got to experience that on our last night all together!

------------------

You know that you’re only making a very small amount of money, but haters gonna hate, you’ve got the best job in the world. People on the outside just don’t understand what it means to spend your summer in the magic that is camp. They don’t understand that you can in fact survive on animal crackers, tomatoes and cranberry juice and that crazy tan lines and greasy hair can be sort of cool. And they’ll never experience the absolute pride of losing your voice after yelling your cabin’s country name during an all camp olympics game, or will they have a story as to why your hands were stained purple for days. People on the outside just don’t get it. But it’s okay. Because you get it, and really, that’s all that matters.

I hope the moments that we had will turn into stories that we will be proud to tell for the rest of our lives. I have no idea what will happen in my future, Storer, but this summer, these people and these experiences are some I will never forget. 

So thank you for letting me linger a little longer (even as an adult) and until we meet again, just know you’ll always be in my heart.

goodbye teenage years-

Woah, not to be cliche at all but where has the time gone? I don’t know if this is normal whatsoever but I loved being a teenager. 

Each year I experienced countless memories and lessons and endless love and laughter. I have met more people than I could have ever imagined and made some of my best friends along the way. I have no idea how I could put into words how much I have accomplished, been through and done in the past 6 years. 

I, like most teenagers, would say growth was the word I most achieved as a teenager. I have matured and grown into the person I want to be and who I was created to be. My teenage years have not always been sunshine and rainbows but I’m slowly learning life sometimes throws some crazy storms at you. 

here are just a few small highlights over this period of my life: 

At 13, I was finishing my 8th grade year and I was confirmed in the Catholic Church.

At 14, I just started high school and my Busi unfortunately passed away. 

At 15, I became best friends with The Crew and became more involved in church. This was a huge step in my teenage years that I will never ever regret! I am so happy this happened!

At 16, I got my temps and started to learn how to drive. I also went to my first prom as a junior. Unfortunately, I got chicken pox this year and had to stay home from school for a week. Junior year wasn’t my favorite because one of my best friends at the time, just decided not to be friends with me anymore. It was the first time I was that close to someone and it changed me forever. On a brighter side, I got to attend Buckeye Girls State that summer and become Junge City Council President!

At 17, I got my license, a car and graduated from high school. I also started at my first job in 2016. 

At 18, I got my second job, which is where I still am now. Also, I started college and commuting 35 minutes to get there. Another big event during this year was in January of 2017, I went to Washington DC for my 2nd time. 18 was a hard year, learning a lot and experiencing things I never have before.

At 19, I took another trip to DC in January for The March for Life. I went to Cedar Point twice. Another huge thing that happened to me was, I started working at camp for 2 months- a dream I’ve had for so long. (blog post coming soon!) 

The only thing I have for 20 so far is I celebrated it at camp and got to climb the newest climbing tower!

Being a teenager has taught me numerous things including: how to be responsible for myself and others, learn time management and how to appreciate life and the people around me. I hung out with The Crew so much, made countless memories with my family and drove to the lake more than I can count. 

So, Goodbye Teenage Years! 

You were such a huge adventure and I can’t wait to see what my 20’s bring me!